Shower Jeopardy

I think there needs to be a new Jeopardy category just for parents:

Heard It from the Shower

Today's Daily Double:  In great haste, a parent will exit the shower at the sound of this thing.

~~~

I asked my friends on FB a similar question and got some truly hilarious answers.

There is always something!  Seldom do I make it through an entire shower without at least one mystery noise to decode.

In fact, my peaceful morning routine (after making sure that everyone is squared away with what he/she needs to be doing - school assignments, chores, occupying the littles etc.) typically goes something like this:

(turn on shower)

"Mommy!!  I poooooped!"

(turn off shower)

"Okay, are you good?  I'm getting in the shower now."

(turn on shower)

(knock at the door followed by a muffled complaint/tattle/philosophical question about hippos - I really can't tell.......because I'm in the shower.)

"I can't hear you, so unless it's an emergency, you're going to have to wait."

(muffled talking continues)

"Honey, I can't hear you!  Unless it's an emergency, you're going to have to wait!"

(series of thumps and the sound of running)

This one's like a choose your own adventure...

Thumps and running followed by tears -->  shut off water and investigate.

Thumps and running not followed by tears --> ignore.

(more thumps and running)

(screaming -  but not the hurt kind - the super angry 2yo kind)

"What's going on?"

(more screaming)

"GUYS!  What is going on?"

(no answer)

(shut off water - open one eye with shampoo dripping down my face - yell)

"CAN ANYBODY HEAR ME?!?!"

(a short individual appears outside the shower door with an explanation about who took what from whom)

(no one is injured - water on)

About this time the hot water runs out because someone in the other shower has been using it for a storm scene for Lego guys, while in the shower not actually washing.

(cut my losses, finish up as fast as possible, and pursue any further-needed investigations)

Soooo, today...

This was a new one, actually.

Approximately 2 minutes and 43 seconds into what was going to be a micro-shower anyway, I hear -

CRASH!!!

 clink - clink - clink - clink - clink 

Followed by a collective, "Ohhhhhhh!"

Then silence.

(water off)

"Nobody move!  Don't touch anything!  I want to see how it broke!"

It was definitely the sound of breaking glass!  But I was concerned a window may have been broken by someone on the outside.  So the fact that one of the kids broke it from the inside, strangely, made me feel a lot better.

This is one example of how my motherly propensity toward worst-case-scenario thinking pays off at times.  I can pretty much always think of how something could have been worse, so that makes whatever the something actually is not seem so bad.

The responsible party fessed up right away with penitence and trepidation - 

and a newly-acquired $90 tab, if anyone in the neighborhood is hiring. 

So the final answer in today's Heard It from the Shower category is:

What is the sound of shattering glass?

Cheers y'all!  It's definitely Monday.

Bread Winner

 One of my favorite things about small children is that they do things that just make absolutely zero sense whatsoever.  

It really is an endearing quality - depending on the associated cost, of course.

I am forever stumbling upon these "kid calling cards" that leave me with a figurative thought bubble of question marks above my head.

Taking the prize this week:

 I went to make sandwiches and pulled out what appeared to be a brand new loaf of bread.

But the first piece looked like this.

I was confused.

I removed it and grabbed the next.

Then the next.

 And the next.

And then next.

Until I reached the very last piece, which not surprisingly, also had a hole drilled right through the middle of it.

The entire loaf had been cored!

What in the heck??

Happily, the kids were quick to offer witness statements:

"Oh, Bubby did that."

 "He opened it up and kind of Hulk smashed through the whole thing."

"Yeah, Dad said that's his loaf now; he has to eat it."

So, there you have it!

If you've ever wondered what a loaf of bread looks like that has been Hulk smashed by a 4yo, here you go!

I asked him for myself, "Bubby, why on earth did you Hulk smash an entire loaf of bread?!"

He responded nonchalantly, without looking up from the train he was rolling back and forth at eye-level on the kitchen table, "Oh, I was just looking for cavities."

And here I thought this conversation was going to clear things up.

Sooo, I'm not sure if this means the bread did or did not have cavities, but either way, it appears that Hulk took care of it.

Tender Ammendment

I found this while checking Little Sis' math homework:

That's my girl!  :)

Counting Sheep

 Counting sheep is what I am both doing and not doing at the present moment.

Baby Sis loves her Lambie.  

It's not my first day out, so as soon as she latched onto it as her lovie of choice, I made sure to get Lambie a stunt double - just in case.

(I am certain that any parent of a kid with a lovie knows that feeling of terror and dread when a lovie comes up missing after a trip to the park or the grocery store.)

So in my effort to think ahead, I ended up getting Baby Sis doubly hooked.  In a twist of events, the Lambies became a figuratively inseparable entity, equally-loved, and deemed suitable only as a pair.

Now naptime, and bedtime, and anytime between require, in her words, "Two Lambies!  Two Lambies!"

It has been a loooooong time since I've gotten Baby Sis to part with "Two Lambies" for a much-needed trip through the washing machine, so this morning I decided it was time.

I was on top of it.

First thing in the morning - nowhere near naptime or bedtime - golden.

"Two Lambies" -  and Bubby's blue blankets - were washed and dried before they had barely been missed.

But of course, that leads to the question of the hour:

What does a toddler do with a freshly-washed lovie, right at bedtime, when she is juuuust about to be tucked in for the night?

Pees on it.

Yes, indeed.

So here I sit, waiting on the other half of "Two Lambies" to come out of the wash so that when Baby Sis counts her sheep tonight, I'll be able to count mine too!

:)

Although I would like to add, it's nice to see that Murphy's Kid Law is still alive and well.

If you missed that the first time around, click here!